A "Shitshow"

For my psych clinical I am assigned to Haymarket Center, a drug and rehab facility, once a week to run a group on a woman's residential unit.  I was excited at first but after the first two weeks I think I'd much prefer a hospital unit with diagnosed psych issues as opposed to a bunch of addicts.  We spoke with the women the first week and our group topics will revolve around empowerment and techniques to stay clean upon discharge.  I got really into getting in touch with my teacher roots and creating this great lesson plan on stress management.  The ladies would blow up a balloon and write stressors on it.  I'd explain the pathophysiology of stress and it's effect on the body. We'd discuss how they dealt with stress in the past and introduce healthy techniques for stress management.  Then at the end of the meeting the ladies will express a goal for stress management and pop their stressor balloon.  It was all okay-ed by the unit director and my partner and I were excited to give the ladies more than just another boring lecture.

Unfortunately that is NOT how the group went what so ever.  As we were discussing how we dealt with stress.  One of the women called out everyone saying they did nothing but smoke dope and got high to relieve their stress and that they should "keep it real."  That just spiraled out of control and we had women yelling at each other, women having side conversations, women checked out and just hugging their balloons and women crying.  A counselor eventually came in and yelled at the women to just worry about you and mind your business.  By the time things calmed down, I knew no one was going to be receptive to the healthy stress management techniques, the meat and potatoes of the group.  Then someone popped a ballon and one of the ladies threw her notebook on the ground and stormed out of the room shouting profanity.  Apparently she doesn't do well with loud noises.  The counselor yelled at us say we need to be sensitive about people's issues which kinda frustrated me because we DID okay this with the unit director and no one told me about this ladies "issues" with loud noises.  When leaving one of the ladies said, "the is was the most stressful stress management groups I've ever had."  Funny now, but ridiculous in the moment.    

I was able to talk to one of the crying women in the bathroom, non-hostile environment, where she did not feel like she was being judged or attacked for what she was saying. We were able to discuss for a brief moment before lunch where the real root of her tears were coming from and it was not the stress of the group. We talked about her kids at home and her plans after she finishes the program. I think I was able to reinforce that she was there for herself and to get her family in a good place and that what the other women on the unit do or think should not affect her recovery. She told me she felt better after talking to me and I hope that was honest. I look forward to following up with her next week.

At post conference other students talked about how they couldn't get their group to participate and how they tried to get the residents interested, to which I just chuckled.  When our instructor asked me how our group went I responded, "I don't know how to describe it other than it was a complete shitshow."  We reflected on what happened in the group and my instructor had very positive remarks:  what a great experience,  you did absolutely everything right, I can really see you're heart is in the right place, following up with the crying woman was huge etc.  I loved that the word "shitshow" was used at least 20 times by everyone in post conference, my instructor included.

While I am timid about following up with the group this week I will still give it all I got.  We will not ignore what happened last week, but rather reflect and then move on to our next topic:  Empowerment.  I anticipate this week going a lot smoother.....